Conversational Mistakes
Conversational mistakes you don’t want to make…
>TIP: I observe men in conversation all the time in my bootcamps, seminars, and just observing. Most of the mistakes they make can be easily corrected. But the one thing you MUST learn is how to adapt your conversation to your target.
Jump to this program for learning how you can do this in as little as a week: http://www.alphaconfidence.com/conversation-persuasion/
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It’s interesting. I watch guys in the field all the time, and the mistakes they make in conversation are – on the whole – relatively small.
BUT what a huge difference they make in terms of the conversation flowing with that VIBE that just draws women in.
You see, you can do most things OKAY when it comes to women, but one thing you MUST learn how to do exceptionally well is learn how to talk to women. And I mean, TALK to women – in their language.
Most guys are only capable of talking in terms of facts and logistics…
– “Hey, let’s meet up for drinks at 8:00 at Jillian’s…”
– “The Steelers are down in rushing yards this season…”
– “My stockbroker has a tip on a new tech company. I’m buying options on Monday…”
– “Where did you go to school?”
I actually heard these things said to women, and I saw the glimmer of hope in the woman’s eye that this guy MIGHT be different get snuffed out like a candle.
I’ll bet you even read those words and thought to yourself: “What’s wrong with those? I talk like this all the time.”
Sure. To GUYS.
Ah, my Alpha Brother, you must learn how to talk to women in their NATIVE tongue if you want them to give you mad monkey love.
What language are women speaking?
Women speak in terms of emotions, experience, and sensation.
They don’t care so much about the WHEN, or the WHERE, or the silly facts.
Women care more about the WHAT, the WHY, and the HOW…
They want to understand their emotional experience, while comparing it to others’.
So let’s do a little translation here, so I can get you into the swing of learning how to talk to women the RIGHT way.
– HE SAID: “Hey, let’s meet up for drinks at 8:00 at Jilian’s…” If you want a woman to buy into your schedule, Mr. Palm Pilot, you need to tell her more than the time and the place. You gotta give her a small taste of the experience:
“Hey, have you ever had chicken wings that make your eyes tear up and your nose sting? How about the sensation of having an ice cold Anchor Steam to wash it down? Meet me over at Jillian’s at 8:00 and we’ll make it happen…”
Give her a reason to show up, and she probably WILL.
– HE SAID: “The Steelers are down 318 rushing yards this season…”
Oh, man. YAWN.
(Y.A.W.N. = Yet Another Wussy Nerd.)
Sports statistics are about as interesting to a woman as your last bellybutton cleaning experience, Chodely.
Try this on for size:
“When my favorite team isn’t performing, it just hits home because you get to know these guys, and you think you know what they’re capable of. And they don’t mean to disappoint you, but when you know they are capable of so much more, you just feel let down. You long for that feeling of being on top again, you know? To get that thrilling feeling of winning and achieving all over again.”
Give her experiences she can relate to and you’ll draw her in likea moth to a porch-light.
– HE SAID: “My stockbroker has a tip on a new tech company. I’m buying options on Monday…”
Sounds like the last ten bragging guys I overheard trying to impress a woman. This game is as transparent as glass and just as easily broken.
Let’s be clear here: Women DO NOT trust guys who try too hard. If you really have value, you don’t need to impress or prove yourself. Your value is established.
Have you ever seen a Lamborghini brochure? A Lamborghini commercial on television? How about a billboard with a Gallardo on it?
No. You don’t, and you WON’T.
Why?
Because Lamborghinis sell themselves. Their value is already there.
If you have to be sold on the benefits of a premium sports car with over 500 horsepower and a top speed over 200 miles per hour, you don’t deserve the car.
And Lamborghini KNOWS they have this kind of value. How well do YOU feel that kind of value about yourself? Are you more valuable than a sports car?
You better believe it, my friend.
Talk to women in terms of EMOTION and EXPERIENCE, not try-hard bragging.
Try this instead:
“So I had an opportunity to invest in a company, and I had some concerns initially. I felt a little uncertain about another technology stock. You know what I mean? I think we’ve all been burned by that. My instincts told me to be careful. So I made up my mind to take this one by the horns and do some research on it. I decided to use my head and actually learn about the company. Now I feel good about my decision to make an investment commitment in them. I think that’s really important, don’t you?”
There. You showed you were smart, trusted your instincts, capable of action, and you took care of business. A woman will respect and relate to that.
Oh, and you used the C-word. “Commit.” You show you have standards, and that when they’re met, you’ll do what women don’t think men do.
– HE SAID: “Where did you go to school?”
This is another Y.A.W.N. question. It’s where a guy thinks that just by pulling out the random facts of her past, he will create some kind of “magical” connection.
It looks low-risk, but it’s really just conversational suicide. It says, “I can’t think of anything original and exciting to talk about, so I’ll just regurgitate the same thing the last ten guys asked you.”
And you probably should take note of the fact that those last ten guys are NOT with her right now, so you might consider that a hint.
If it doesn’t work, stop doing it.
DON’T ask a question about her.
Instead, get her to EXPERIENCE something WITH you.
Try this on for size:
“I was talking to my friend about school the other day, and what our craziest experience was. You look like a person with a lot of crazy stuff in your past. Tell me something fun about your history…”
If she tries to act shy and avoids giving up any interesting information, you ask her, “Oh, you’re one of those girls who’s no fun, huh? You never go out and get crazy. I bet you can knit like crazy, though… Oh well. It was going so good for you there for a while.”
Tease her a little and she’ll rise to the challenge. All in the name of FUN … not some game of “social value.” Just show her FUN.
Oh, and when she does start opening up and revealing, you must never judge.
NEVER judge.
And get her to expand and describe her experience as much as you can. Pull out all the sensory details of that experience until her eyes glaze a bit and you can she that she’s experiencing it all over again. When you get this skill (as I teach in my Conversation & Persuasion program) you will out-shine any pickup artists out there.
You will get what most men never achieve with women: TRUE connection.
If you want these skills of masterful communication, I’ve got something you need to see. I spent about 3 months in my studio earlier this year creating a KILLER program on how to learn every bit of conversational strategy that a man can find.
Everything. From how to negotiate to how to talk to women, to how to tell if someone’s telling the truth, to being charismatic and persuasive, to how to respond to women’s tests…
“I just went through your program on conversation & communication, and it blew me away…” – Grant Adams
You need to have a look at this…
Go here now:
http://www.alphaconfidence.com/conversation-persuasion/
I’ll talk to you soon,
Your friend,
Carlos Xuma
PS: If you have seen the program before, I urge you to take another look. If you get it within the next 24 hours, I’ll send you a special bonus e-book – a timeless classic and masterpiece of strategy that can be applied to every area of your life.
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