Question & Answer with Carlos
Hey Carlos,
Your dating materials are WORTH THEIR WEIGHT IN GOLD!!! I seriously have improved my skills with women because of you man! Thank you SO MUCH! I wasn’t too bad with women to begin with honestly. I have good outer game, but my inner game is what I need to work on.
I somehow manage to get obsessed with one woman and try to hard, which just ends up screwing things up for me. Thankfully, I have learned what NOT to do now thanks to your materials.
Anyway, here is my situation. I have been dating this girl for about 3 1/2 months now, but I feel as though I’m beginning to lose her interest and attraction for me. She has been blowing me off lately, AND she has been hanging out with this other guy lately a bunch who likes her.
I’m a Naval Officer about to move to Pensacola for flight school, and I think this is why she isn’t taking me as seriously as she would if I wasn’t moving away. I don’t want things to end with her. What should I do to make her WANT me to be her boyfriend??? PLEASE HELP BRO!!!____________________
CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:
I hate tooting my own horn, so it’s nice when a reader does it for me.
Well, I’m going to be honest that even if you managed to “keep” her, you’d still be out of the picture when you go to flight school, so I would not get into this scarcity mindset right now.
You’re thinking from the “I’m losing my girl” mindset, which makes you the needy one. Remember, you never “own” or “have” a woman, and the illusion that you can actually possess her is often a real liability to your attitude.
And it’s also another kind of self-deception to think that you can “make” a woman want anything. She either will or she won’t. The point is not to manipulate a single woman, but to demonstrate the qualities that the right women will WANT from you.
In other words, you don’t MAKE the bear step in your trap – you simply provide the kind of bait that it is IRRESISTIBLE to it.
Look at it this way, too: When you’re not around physically, it’s going to be next to impossible for you to create the kind of locked-in attraction that you need to keep her faithful while you’re gone. If she’s already hanging with another guy, your exit visa is all but stamped, my friend.
ALPHA RULE: The man that is PRESENT in a woman’s life has the wild card when it comes to attraction. Whether he uses it right is up to him. But he trumps any chump that’s not in the picture.
You MIGHT keep her for now, but it would be a futile cause the second your ass hits the seat of that plane for Florida.
What you really need to do is this: YOU be the one to break it off with her.
Dude, you’re in the military. Your uniform alone is going to score you more tail than you can imagine.
You also need to start sending the right messages to your subconscious mind, and by YOU being the one to end it, YOU are the one in control. You affirm your own power and might, and your own ability to lead.
And make no mistake about it – your subconscious mind will use this as evidence to further boost your confidence with women.
If you can’t break it off with a woman when it’s necessary, no matter what your feelings are for her, you will probably end up back in that addicted state again, spiraling the drain.
YOU control your emotional state. Self-discipline!
When you fight the inevitable, you take a toll on your attitude. Right now, I can even read the desperation in your email, and trust me that it’s NOT attractive to anyone.
You can stay in touch with her, but don’t get “one-itis” – that mysterious disease that makes you think she’s the “one” – with this chick. It’s not worth it.
The best thing you can do is to just cut it off completely. Show her you’re the one with the market value.
And get back to reading my materials again. You need to review them and really get back in touch with the Alpha Mindset.
You’re in a world of abundance, my friend.
Start acting like it! 🙂
