Question & Answer with Carlos
QUESTION:
Top of the day. Recently I’ve been reading the Dating Black Book and the Seduction Method. Greak work man! Breaking the ice isn’t really a problem for me,after reading your books.
What I don’t understand is I feel I build enough rapport with the girls I’ve been talking to recently. I mean I tell them how I’m into male and female interactions and from the questions I would ask – which was mostly the questions you asked Kathy in your Advanced Coaching program – [and] they would completely tell me everything they wanted to see in a man…
The craziest thing happened to me at a party. I was cock-blocked by this stunning girl’s friend. Her friend was a lesbian, so I didn’t think she would be jealous of her friend talking to me. She could tell her friend was deep into the conversation with me, and would always pull her away.
What would I do in that kind of situation?
______________________
CARLOS XUMA’S ADVICE:
Of course she could be jealous of her friend talking to you. The lesbian chick was simply being protective – she was jealous because you were hitting on the woman she was attracted to.
“Ohhhh YEAH! Girl-on-girl action!”
Don’t get so excited there, skeeter.
In reality, you should have worked to befriend the potential cockblocker lesbian. (Wow, that’s gotta be the first time I’ve ever used that term.) When you see that there’s another woman in the mix, you need to work for her interest, too, or she’s going to pull the pin on your grenade and ruin your game.
So what do you do when you do all the right things and you still find yourself blocked?
You have only one real option – You have to do whatever you have to.
What? You think that’s too non-specific?
There’s a part of a recent movie I want to tell you about. The movie is called “The Last Kiss” and it stars Zach Braff (of “Scrubs” fame.) Zach is a great guy, and I loved “Garden State,” but this movie was the epitome of the “chick flick.” Still, there’s usually something worth redeeming in these movies, a lesson to be learned.
I did find one such nugget in this movie. The dad of the girlfriend talks to Zach about the cheating and how she won’t see him, and Zach asks the dad what to do to get her back. “You do whatever you have to,” he says. Meaning, it’s not WHAT you do, it’s that you keep going until you succeed. IF you really want her back.
Well, long story short, Zach sleeps out on the porch for a few days, and eventually she relents. I’m not sure of the lesson there except that if you annoy and persistently try hard enough, any woman will ignore her self-respect and just take you back. Anyway…
The message for you is this – If there’s something you want, you don’t let ANYTHING stop you. The ultimate statement of desire is your work to GET what it is you desire. Nothing else speaks louder than that.
I know a hundred guys that would say: “Man, I want a Lamborghini!” Yeah, sure, dude. What guy doesn’t want a $200,000 sports car?
But how many of them would be willing to really WORK their asses off to make the money for that car?
Not that many. They don’t REALLY want that car. They’re just saying they’d like to have it if it doesn’t mean too much effort on their part. They’re tantalized by the possibility, but inside their own head they’ve already decided that they’ll never actually have it.
Contrast this with the guy who will actually DO what is necessary to acquire what he wants. The guy who sits down and devises a plan to get the things in life he wants. The man with the plan is the one that usually gets what he desires.
IF he wants it bad enough.
So when lesbian friend drags your girl away, do you let her? No, dude. You go right back in there with your knife clenched between your teeth… you duck under the barbwire, and you avoid the landmines. You persist.
Just go back up to the woman and say, “Hey, I realize we all didn’t get a chance to bond properly there and all, but I thought you were interesting. I knew that if I didn’t come over and at least get your number, I’d never forgive myself.”
You don’t give up.
You are persistent not because you come from a place of weakness and lack – but from a place of desire and Alpha Strength.
– Carlos Xuma
http://www.datingdynamics.com
