30 Days To Success With Women – Day 7

MISSION: Body State Exercise.

To transition from “in your head” to “in your GAME.”

Okay, we’ve cleared out a lot of the cobwebs in your head. Now let’s get the prep work in place so that you can feel ready to rock ‘n’ roll.

First of all, you need to realize that your body and mind are connected, like vines that have grown around and into an old house.

Most people are brought up to have two different experiences of life: What goes on in their heads, and what goes on in their physical body. But at the same time, we also let things like having a cold or sickness affect our moods and our state of mind. It’s very hard for us to feel the mind-body connection any other time, unfortunately.

But I’m sure you’ve also had the experience of a good workout, where you came home pleasantly exhausted from the gym, or hiking, or a bike ride, or a run. You have that ache in your body that somehow feels good.

When you approach women and meet women in bars, clubs, on the street – or wherever you go – you have to be RELAXED.

Not “falling asleep” relaxed, but you gotta feel physically relaxed.

Here’s the first part of today’s mission:

1) Make a list of all the physical symptoms of fear and tension you feel when you approach, or while you’re talking with women.

For me, it was a burning sensation in my stomach, my forehead felt cold, and my hands went numb. Oh, yeah… my legs got all rubbery, too.

Then, what I want you to do is close your eyes, and mentally get yourself all “worked up.” Imagine you’re in that situation, and feeling those sensations. As you do this, you’ll feel your body tense up, and your physiology will change, as will your posture. If you feel anything new, now is the time to make note of it.

And then I want you to do the next step:

2) Take in the deepest breath you can – deep into your stomach, and feel the breath push against your backbone. Exhale in three outward breaths. The first one gets about 80 percent of the air out. The next will get about 15 more percent. And that last little 5% will be an effort.

When the air is all out, do it again.

Each time you do this, imagine your body softening up – as if you’re made out of wax and you’re standing in the sun. Don’t let yourself slouch or droop, but just soften up.

Do this exercise 9 times. (You want to do any deep breathing or “chi” exercises in sets of 3.)

It’s another “deceptively simple” exercise that really works wonders. Nothing relaxes your body like a good deep breath. I have to remind myself to breathe when I’m working – ALL the time! And I’ve been doing “chi-gong” exercises for many years now. The second something stressful enters your brain, your mind will unplug from your body.

I use my visits to the dentist to practice this. When he’s scraping and cleaning – and let’s face it, this isn’t pleasant – I fold my hands in my lap and I make a conscious exercise of breathing and “un-clenching” my body.

When I’m done, I feel much better, and more focused.

Do this exercise 3 times today, if you can find the time. And you should add this to your daily ritual.

– Carlos Xuma

Coming soon: How to get your natural “vibe” for approaching…