4 Killer Ways to Stop Being Spineless Around Women
Have you ever been in a situation where a girl keeps shooting you down at every turn?
It’s like no matter what you do, she’s always coming up with some excuse not to take things further with you.
All you want to be is this swell guy who’ll take care of her, make her feel great about herself and basically NOT be like those other jerks orbiting her.
But there she is anyway, falling into the arms of some douche who doesn’t know the first thing about treating women right.
Or does he?
If you’re tired of losing out to other men and feeling like a hollow, emasculated shell of yourself, maybe it’s time for a change.
Let’s get into some ways you can drastically alter the way you deal with women so they’ll not just like you, but go out of their way to be WITH you:
#1: Don’t Be Her Friend a.k.a. Teddy Bear Syndrome
Sorry to say, but you’ll never end up in her bedroom if you’re on the path leading you away from it. And that road is called “Friendship”.
Comedian Bill Burr once advised NOT to be the equivalent of a teddy bear to a woman if your goal is to seduce her. It’s a metaphor he came up for a guy who’s neutered himself for the sake of getting close to a girl.
Sad part is, this guy will never break through that “Let’s Just be Friends” glass ceiling because he already handed over his manhood without knowing it.
Case in point: have you ever gone out of your way to accommodate a girl’s outlandish whims or requests, like driving her around or helping her pick out her cocktail dress for her company dinner (and you’re not her “plus one”?).
Men need to stop this desperate, needy behavior that doesn’t bring them any closer to women. You’re only putting yourself in the same “compartment” of her life as her female friends.
#2: “NO” is Your New Magic Word
So what’s a guy to do if he isn’t supposed to take the friends route with a girl?
I’ll tell you what you need to do instead – grow a pair and MAN UP.
Be the masculine guy you’re supposed to be and espouse all those traits that women crave.
I’m talking about not being worried over her opinion of you. Have a little nerve to push back a bit, give her “crap” and call her out (in a funny, lighthearted way) if she’s treating you like one of her girlfriends.
And that means turning her down when she tries to take you on one of those activities best suited for her gal pals.
This is especially true if you have to wreck your plans for the week just to go the “extra mile” for her.
If you’ve been the guy who agrees with women on absolutely everything, this is your chance to STOP doing that.
Let’s face it – men and women are different, and with that comes disagreements every now and then. Don’t be afraid to embrace those differences because it’s what creates SEXUAL tension in the first place.
So turn her down and tell her you have something else going on. Then later on, ask her out on your own terms instead.
By refusing to be her teddy bear and taking the initiative to make plans, you’re already reclaiming your masculinity.
She won’t realize what’s happening, but she’ll actually like that you’ve turned the tables on her. So don’t worry about rocking the boat, so to speak.
#3: Get Busy Living – With or Without Her
You know the problem with saying “yes” all the time to women?
It gives them the impression that you’re willing to fall off the face of the Earth just to please them.
Women may think that this is what they want in a man, but trying to fit into this “ideal guy” mold doesn’t do anything for them, attraction-wise.
Instead, be a man and keep living your life in a way that works for you – even if she’s in the picture. If you have something important coming up, don’t be afraid to tell her.
It’s actually healthy to let her know that you have other stuff going on aside from her (in a gentle, subtle way of course). It wouldn’t hurt for her to think from time to time, “What could be more important to him than going to the flea market with me and picking out homemade earrings?”
If you keep dropping your plans at the drop of a hat to look like the “perfect guy”, you’ll be operating from a place of insecurity – and spinelessness.
In the end, she’ll inexplicably find herself less and less attracted to you, even though you think you were just trying to please her.
#4: Don’t Rely on Her to Boost Your Ego
So naturally, you’ll want to keep doing the things that make you an interesting guy even if you can’t stop thinking about her.
Most men underestimate the importance of having that crazy, wild-eyed zeal for life. They don’t realize that if they stop pursuing the things they care about, it will carry over to their dating life.
Think about it: you know that one friend that all men have, the one who runs himself ragged trying to please his girl and having NO TIME whatsoever for himself?
(And incidentally, it also explains is why he never hangs out with you anymore and flakes out at the last minute.)
He used to be this funny, spirited guy to hang out with. But now he’s like that lion with the glazed look in his eyes from being at the zoo for too long.
Don’t be like him. Don’t limit your reality to meeting and attracting women.
It’s ok to want a woman in your life, but balance your need for companionship with a little perspective.
This is why a “nice guy” can never make headway with women – he’s hoping for that special girl who’s going to “complete” or “fix” him.
NEWS FLASH: That’s not what women are for. You need to do that for yourself!
If you act like that around a girl, she’ll sense the neediness and find every possible way to disentangle herself from your “friendship tactics”.
The solution? Cultivate a genuine enthusiasm for accomplishing things OUTSIDE of dating.
Pretty soon, you’ll find yourself naturally at ease with women. That’s because your life won’t fall apart when she doesn’t return your calls or reassure you what a great guy you are.
Remember, your identity and self-worth should never depend on a woman’s approval – it comes from WITHIN.
If you’ve been doing all of these, but still feel that there’s something “lacking”, you probably haven’t harnessed your Alpha Sexual Power yet.
It’s one of the most effective ways to effortlessly generate attraction in women that a lot of men don’t know about.
Stay Alpha…
– Carlos Xuma
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